![]() ![]() It's a picture of a mad old cow who he thought the world of. Whistler was perfectly aware that his mother was a hideous old bat who looked like she'd had a cactus lodged up her backside, he stuck with her, and even took the time to paint this amazing picture of her. And as I've learned, by staying with my best friend, David Langley and his family, families are very important. well, this picture is worth such a lot of money, because. Why was it worth this man, here, spending fifty million of your American dollars on this portrait? And the answer is. Secondly, and I'm getting quite near the end of this. Because if it was really small, you know, microscopic, then hardly anyone would be able to see it, which would be a tremendous shame. So, what have I learned that I can say about this painting? Well, firstly, it's quite big, which is excellent. And my job is to sit and look at paintings. Let's prosecute you for negligence." Then I go to jail, my wife leaves me, my daughter becomes a prostitute, I wind up on death row sharing a cell with Butch McDick! All right, calm down. Why am I worried about this?! You did it! All I have to do is go out and tell them what happened! Oh, perfect! Then they'll say, "Who left him alone with the picture?" And I say, "Me"! And they'll say "You're fired!" I say "Fine"! No, no, no, no, no! Then they say "Firing's not enough. What? What? What? What? OH, JEEZ! OH, GOD! OH, OH, JEEZ! GOD, OH! MARY, MOTHER OF JESUS! JESUS OF NAZARETH! Wait a minute. Tell him his is a butt I would dearly love to kick. Well, you're a braver man than me, and I single-handedly take on gangs armed with AK-47s. Are you willing to take responsibility for his actions? Why don't you get another ticket? Could be more fun second time round. Slowly place it on the floor and take three steps back. Get your people over here now! Get out of the way! Get out of the way! Move it! Move! Move! Move! Police! Coming through!Ĭome on, lady! Watch it! Move! There he is! There he is! Move! Move! Move! Police! everyone on the floor now! Ĭarefully take out your weapon, holding the butt with two fingers only. Police! Come on! Come on, watch it! Watch it! Everybody, out of the way! In pursuit of a 415, male with a gun heading into zone 10, terminal 2. Bean is a genius at the very highest order! Oh, come on, everybody! It's gonna be great! Dr. ![]() I don't know why we have these family conferences if Dad's already made up his mind. Jennifer, no one is asking you to marry him! Okay, so he's gonna look like Meat Loaf's butt. Hey, for all you know, he could be very cute. It doesn't matter! What I'm saying here is that Dr. I think more like "What's the meaning of life?" Yeah, like "What is an intrauterine device"? Kevin, you know how sometimes you ask me questions that I can't answer. Well, at number one with the bullet is Dr. Donald LiebensonĬome on, it's gonna be great! Let's say there's a chart of the most intelligent people you've ever met in your lives. Younger children will find a kindred spirit in Bean, who exists in some kind of state of grace, whether trying to digest a disgusting seafood dinner or hilariously lip-syncing to an opera in a public square. But in the classic tradition of the silent-movie clowns, Bean's visual comedy is universal and requires little translation (there are limited subtitles in this film). Here, the shock gag has replaced the sight gag, and this G-rated Holiday might be considered by more jaded viewers as out of step with contemporary tastes (unlike Borat, there is not a mean-spirited bone in Bean's gangly, malleable body). Bean's Holiday, an upgrade over the 1997 feature Bean, was a box-office smash around the world, but in the States, not so much. Bean also stumbles upon a commercial shoot directed by a stereotypical egomaniacal American filmmaker (Willem Dafoe), and crosses paths with an aspiring actress (a charming Emma de Caunes) also on her way to Cannes. En route, he comes to the "aid" of a Cannes Film Festival judge's young son, who is separated (no thanks to Bean) from his father at the train station. ![]() But getting there is all the funny, as he is detoured by one mishap after another. Hulot's Holiday), the resourceful man-child Bean (Rowan Atkinson) wins a church raffle that packs him off to the beaches of the south of France. Bean's Holiday (the title echoes Jacques Tati's breezy 1953 classic Mr. Bean! After a too-long hiatus, it's a breath of fresh air to see you out and about, innocent as ever, unwitting in the havoc you wreak and clueless in the chaos you cause. ![]()
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